Chain Letter Ladders

Chain Letter Ladders

Let's smash!

* * *

Chain: Don't go down the ladder!!

Ocean Elf: Huh? What ladder? The only way down anywhere here in this house is the staircase.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Hah! A cyber image ladder made of some sort of ascii? Okay then, I'm com in' after ya! *Wicked grin, starts climbing down*

Chain: I'm telling you- don't go.

Ocean Elf: I'm telling you it's too late. You've already dared me, and I'm coming for you. *Climbs down further.*

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Wow, still got a long way to go. Does this thing have an end?

Chain: Are you listening to me? Don't!

Ocean Elf: Bwahahahaha. I'm listening so I can hear where you are, and come and get you! Here I come! Take a look around while you still can, chain dude/chick, whatever you are, I - will - get - you!

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Gosh, come on, this thing has got to end somewhere.

Chain: Hellooo... Don't go!

Ocean Elf: Hel-lo! Getting closer, aren't I? Coming for you, hoaxer!

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: *Climbing climbing climbing*

Chain: You... you don't go.

Ocean Elf: Yes, me go down and find you… And then, you go nowhere.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Down down down…

Chain: You're still not listening to me.

Ocean Elf: *Hears frightened hoaxer's voice considerably nearer* Oh yes I am, just not listening in the way you want me to do. Muahahahahahaha. Here I come! *Wicked grin*

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf:Getting there.

Chain: I can't talk to you anymore.

Ocean Elf: Oh, now you're finally catching on - well, too late, chain jerk, I'm coming for you! *Climbs down*

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Oh, come on.

Chain: You listen to me... don't go down there!

Ocean Elf: Oh, you're getting so frightened that you're forgetting to keep quiet. I'm - getting - closer!

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Down, down, down.

Chain: Can't you just listen to me?

Ocean Elf: Wow, you're really panicking. I can smell it from here. *Climbs further down* Hmmm, I like the feel of these ascii ladders.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Getting closer.

Chain: Okay, you are starting to drive me crazy...

Ocean Elf: Bwahahahahahahaha! Tough on you, init? Here I come!

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Should be nearly there…

Chain: You are!

Ocean Elf: I am - a lot of things, and I am coming for you.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: *Climbing*

Chain: Are you bored yet?

Ocean Elf: I'm rarely bored. Especially when on the hunt to kick some chain butt. And it takes patience to be a hunter. I know you're down there somewhere.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: Getting closer.

Chain: Last chance... don't go down there.

Ocean Elf: Too late, chain dipstick, I should be almost down by now. I have your location pinpointed. It won't be long now.

Chain:
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬
╬═╬

Ocean Elf: wow, that was a long ladder.

Chain: I WARNED YOU IF YOU DONT SHARE THIS YOU WILL DIE TONIGHT!

Ocean Elf: You never warned me of *that* before now, you only said to not go down this ladder. Well, now I have, and by your issuing this bogus death threat, you have sealed your own fate! Good riddance, chump! *Hinges hoaxer to bottom of ladder with some kind of cyber material, climbs back up the ladder, then activates a button at the top that makes the ladder coil up with the hoaxer inside.*

* * *

Chain: ...................................................
-
-
-
-

Ocean Elf: *Peers over and down* What? Another ladder? What's going on here, an underground army of dealive chain freaks?

Okay, here goes, down another internet ladder. *Begins climbing down*

Chain: -
-
-
-
-

Ocean Elf: hmmmm. Wait, what's that? Something's a little off. *Goes down the rest of the way* I'm coming for you…

Chain -
-
-
-
-
-

Ocean Elf: Hah! Now what?

Chain: An eight year old girl died

Ocean Elf: Hey drongo! I hate to break it to you, but that is not a unique situation, in fact, it happens far too much. Little kids shouldn't die. But they do… All over the world. The difference between them and your nameless generic girl is they are real, and she is not. So don't expect any tears from me.

Chain: and if you don't repost,she'll come into your room,laugh,then kill you

Ocean Elf: 1. She can't go anywhere if she's dead.

2. She can't harm anyone if she's imaginary.

3. Guess what? she's your imaginary dead girl, which means she for sure can't do a thing to anyone.

4. The one who's laughing is me. Your hoax is particularly brainless.

*Raps on hoaxer's head, climbs back up the ladder and hefts it out of the hole* There, you're trapped!

* * *

Chain: Don't Look. c;

Ocean Elf: Sheesh, what is it with you chain freaks and this "Don't read" "read this!" Don't look" "Look" stuff?

If you don't want it read or looked at, don't repost! In fact, don't repost anyway, because chain letters are stupid and a great way to make enemies. Partticularly of me.

Chain:
-
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-

Ocean Elf:Another ladder? Okay, here I come! *Climbing down the series of dashes*

Chain:
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-

Ocean Elf: Whatever's at the bottom better be worth my while.

Chain:
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-

Ocean Elf: I'm down, Now what?

Chain: Repost this or you will have 7 years of bad luck starting tomorrow

Ocean Elf: Hey idiot! *Whack!* Guess what? You can't dictate anybody's future, especially with this nutty chain letter!

*Climbs back up the dash ladder, then hauls it up after her* Now You're stuck down there. See where creating chain letters that annoy people has got you?